Closet honkey

1. They are more concerned about what they scored in their last maths test than who won the footy on the weekend.

2. They feel discraced when an untie's son or daughter has a better job or is in a better uni course than they are.

3. They prefer going to the casino and playing the pokies rather than going to the pub and playing the same machines.

4. They think Chinese rice wine is much better than an Australian red or white.

5. They have recently learnt how to twirl their pen around all their fingers.

6. Argues that Faye Wong and Aaron Kwok Are the real Pepsi icons instead of Michael and Janet Jackson.

7. They suddenly find multicolored and undersized T-shirts with fluffy animals on them very appealing.

8. They start going to karaoke with other Asian people stating that they only wish to sing the English songs.

9. They begin to bargain for prices at the local fruit shop.

10. They start to bargain for prices at Harvey Norman.

11. They start to bargain for prices at Gucci.

12. They suddenly have a plethora of sticker photos of them with all their new Asian friends.

13. They suddenly prefer Kam Fook shark Fin Restaurant to the most popular Mod Aus Restaurants.

14. Their garage is full of old things that they have recently collected, sighting the reason thay they might come in handy one of these days.

15. Now they feel sick in their stomach if they go without rice for more than one week.

16. When you go to MacDonalds, they suggest that everybody shares their value meals.

17. when you guys go out to KFC, they always insist on paying for the meal.

18. All of a sudden, they go back to Hong Kong to shop for clothes and electronics every chance they get.

19. They get dressed up all nice everytime you guys go out, even to the local pub.

20. They all of a sudden lose all sporting skill and hand eye coordination.

21. Their old eye glasses are now not good enough, and they now sport a pair of thick plastic framed orange glasses shaped like fly's eyes.

22. They prefer to drink Iced Lemon Tea instead of Coke or Fanta.

23. They need to have soy sauce with the usual Sunday roast.

24. They wish to dye their hair black with brown and gold streaks.

25. All of a sudden, skinny and weak is cool and desirable.

26. They have lost interest in all big busted Women.

27. Chow Yum Fat has replaced keanu Reeves or Brad Pitt as who they most want to be like and idolise.

28. They do all their homework without their mum having to tell them to.

29. Honkey music CDs are much better than english ones.

30. They start reading the Japanese comic books bought from Asian stationary shops even though they do not understand a single word that is being said.

31. Japan is the ultimate country in the world now, replacing the USA.

32. They suddenly have a playstation, a N64 and a Dreamcast.

33. Buying pirated merchandise is suddenly acceptable and more economical.

34. They decide that they want to learn the Piano or the Violin instead of the drums.

35. People ask if they understand english when they walk into a shop.

36. They pick up chicks at the local library instead of the local RSL club.

37. They need to use skin products everyday so that the harsh Australian sun will not tarnish their good complexions

38. They decide to move back home and live with their parents until they are married.

39. They get their mum to introduce their untie's daughters to them.

40. They don't need a calculator to do complex maths sums, preferring to do them by hand, as it makes them feel more satisfied.

41. They begin to add la and ma onto the end of every sentence spoken.

42. Their new dream car is now a Volvo changing from a Falcon or Commodore.

43. Their dream job is becoming an Accountant instead of a council worker.

44. They begin to play Badmington instead of Rugby.

45. They feel inferior because their Chinese is not perfect.

46. They decide to move to live in Haymarket, Strathfield or Chatswood instead of Penrith or Blacktown.

47. High rise apartments are much better than the hassle of a big house and garden.

48. When they go on holidays they prefer to fly Cathay Pacific wherever their destination might be.

49. They are disappointed with getting 99% in their maths test.

50. And the last one, they must have ICQ and a mobile Phone.